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# How to stop being a plastic bag
- URL: https://www.aliciamckay.co.nz/how-to-stop-being-a-plastic-bag/
- Published: 2020-10-21T21:08:00.000Z
- Updated: 2026-07-21T02:01:41.000Z
- Description: As Henry David Thoreau wrote: 'Things do not change; we change.'
- Author: Alicia McKay
- Tags: Leadership, #wednesday-wisdom

American Beauty is one of my favourite movies. In one memorable scene, we watch Ricky’s video of an empty, wrinkled plastic bag tossed about in the wind. We follow the bag as it whips about violently, spiralling skyward and then floating to the ground.

> 'And this bag was like, dancing with me. Like a little kid begging me to play with it. For fifteen minutes. And that’s the day I knew there was this entire life behind things.'  
>  
> – Ricky, American Beauty

Have you ever opened your calendar to find nothing but other people’s priorities staring back at you? Look at it now.

It happens quickly; your calendar is just the tip of the iceberg. You're not alone if you’ve ever felt swept up in the rhythm and frustrated by the lack of space for stuff you care about. Many well-intentioned people feel a bit like Ricky’s plastic bag. Pulled and tugged in all directions, they find themselves at the mercy of other people’s choices and priorities.

Unlike a plastic bag, you have agency. You can’t control the wind, but taking responsibility for your actions is the mark of real leadership.

We don’t know when the next pandemic will hit. We can’t control how our boss shows up today, what our partner or children will do next, what the economy will do, or whether our customers will be sold on our next big thing. 

But we do have absolute control over our response - and that agency is what life and leadership are all about.

As Thoreau wrote: *'Things do not change; we change.'*

We can seize our sense of agency by:

- Knowing and living by our values
- Having conviction in our thoughts and ideas
- Creating our own rules for how we want to live and work
- Intentionally seeking discomfort and risk
- Making better choices.

Off you go.