Identity
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Choose meaningful friction over costly convenience
We get to choose our hard. Convenience and conformity can have costly second-order effects.
Live on your own terms
Everyone is constrained. There is always too much to do, never enough money, and always someone or something standing in your way. Get clear on what matters to you, play the long game, and live in accordance with your values.
What chronic uncertainty is doing to our lives and careers
A Friday Flurry on the state of work and what it might do to us
How to conquer apathy
The unequivocal solution I would die in a ditch for.
Being a thought leader rotted my brain
A Friday Flurry on escaping performative expertise and avoiding the internet
Are you busy - or burdened?
If you're collapsing under the weight of things, this one is for you.
Identity
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The tension is the engine
Why unresolved conflict may be the thing that keeps a life alive.
What if you’re a character in someone else's story?
What The Slap can teach us about our opinions.
Stop trying to agree with everyone
What Councils have taught me about making decisions under pressure.
WTF do you want? Desire is suspicious; productivity a scam.
First Friday Flurry of 2026 goes hard.
Identity
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Is all advice just projection?
When people tell you what to do, they share more about them than you.
Stop talking shit and start making sense
On communicating clearly and quitting the news
Identity
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You are who you aren't anymore
Straddling the ravioli ravine with a Nashville musician to wonder about the cost of becoming yourself.
NZ Herald Feature - From foster care to own boss: How a teen mum defied the odds
NZ Herald profiles Alicia McKay's journey from foster care and teen pregnancy to international consultant, author, and speaker.
Identity
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Everyday is everything
Find meaning in the daily drudgery or consign yourself to a lifetime of dissatisfaction
The Four Commandments of Priorities
Thou shalt have as few priorities as possible. Thou shalt treat priorities as commitments, not wishes. Thou shalt rank thy priorities. Thou shalt walk the talk in tricky times.
Identity
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Put yourself in situations
You don't need a plan. You need to put yourself in a situation and watch what happens.
Change
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For when it feels like you can't change anything
Everything is connected. Once you see it, you can shift it.
Are you having the wrong argument?
Learn to have better arguments for fuller, fairer, and more focused decision-making.
So nothing right now
Feeling overwhelmed by clutter, commitments, and chaos?
Work
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Revenge of the Arts Degree
BA grads excel at context, patterns, and big-picture thinking. Learn why hiring Arts graduates - and mastering critical thinking frameworks yourself - gives you an edge.
Systems
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You can be the one who changes things
It's never been a better time to change things at work - and it's what your boss wants you to do.
Work
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Mate, it's just work
Many of the big problems we battle during our days are work-related. At the time, they feel catastrophic. But we won't remember them in a week, month, or year.
Identity
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Get problems you're proud of
You will always have problems. So choose ones you're proud of.
Identity
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Are you impatient? Manage daily annoyances with 4 key strategy skills
Tired of feeling frustrated by everyday annoyances? Gain valuable perspective and learn effective strategies to deal with irritating situations.
10 ways to take control of your life
You can take charge of your life by tackling these ten things.
Identity
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10 ways to take charge of your life today
There’s no way of knowing what’s coming next in your life. But there are plenty of things you can take control of.
Success hack: the right people
The company you keep matters. Target your networking to people who will help you grow.
The consequences of your commitment
Unless you're making trade-offs that channel your time, energy, attention and money into your priorities and away from competing demands, they aren't your priorities. They're hopes and wishes.
How to deal with all that pesky sh*t in your life
Many trivial tasks are holding you back from achieving your true potential. Give them the Four D treatment and watch your life change,
Society
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Put your bloody phone down
You're an adult, and you control your time and attention. Put down the damn phone.
Change
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6 ways to stay on track when things turn to shit
Use setbacks as an opportunity to prove your commitment to what matters most. Perfect!
Change
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Why change gets worse before it gets better
Change is hard, even when we want it. Before things improve, they tend to get much worse - and here are five key reasons why that happens.
Change
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How and when to quit things (and how to do it well)
Why you should leave before it's bad, end good things and not let guilt hold you back - and how to do it well.
Time management for consultants - (and everyone else!)
Time management for consultants. Tips and tricks to optimise your schedule to get the most out of your days.
Identity
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How to find your purpose: 7 questions from Mark Manson
If you don’t have the resolve and determination to do good sh*t, leadership is not for you.
Change
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How to move fast without breaking things
Moving fast and breaking things is great, but you should follow these 4 rules to prevent unnecessary stress and headaches.
Work
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The problem with professionalism: rejecting sameness at work
Professionalism is just an acceptable way to discriminate against people in the workplace. It's time we talked about class.
Identity
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Be yourself to beat burnout
Burnout is killing us - but the answer lies within us. Are you owning your reality?
Focus
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How to get on top of your stupidly long list
Learn a handy 7-step system to beating overwhelm and focus your time and energy - free video and workbook.
Change
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Nurture a network of freaks
The company you keep will change who you are as a person. Choose carefully.
Identity
·
You deserve this. Bye.
What to do when other people are negative or jealous about your achievements.
Balancing micro delight and macro despair
How I try to keep my WTF IS THIS SH*T impulse from ruining public events
Identity
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Two unusual questions to help you understand yourself (and your work)
You probably know what you want to do. You might to ask need some different questions. Here's two.
Work
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Pay yourself first: a no-bullshit sequencing guide to your days and life
You're a living, breathing miracle. Your happiness, peace and enjoyment has intrinsic value. You weren't put here to work, and you don't have to suffer to earn joy.
How to use value-based pricing in your consulting business
Value based pricing should be the goal of any consultant. Here's how you can calculate your value, even when your services aren't a direct profit driver.
How consultants create a clear service offer
Successful consultants have a clear service offer. The five components of a consulting offer are: client, results, service, approach and pricing.
Change
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Hope is a terrible recipe for change
Ignore history at your peril. If you hope for the best, plan for the best, but change nothing about yourself or your approach, you'll fail.
Identity
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'AHA'! meet: the Ambitious High Achiever
Some people are wired for ambition and achievement. If that's you, you will probably suffer, until you change your internal dialogue.
Work
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Like it or not, you're in sales: here's a new framework
You don't need to be a sleazy car salesman to know how to sell. Level up your impact at work by improving your sales skills. The secret: showing more CARE.
Identity
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You don't know how great you can be: expand your possibilities
You don't know how good you are, until you lean in, learn and make increasingly finer distinctions. It all starts with a leap - which you've done before.
Work
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The difference between employees and entrepreneurs
Not everyone is cut out for entrepreneurship - and nor should they be. Here's the critical differences, and how you can choose.
Identity
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What to do with criticism: who to listen to, and who to ignore
If you don't want their outcome, don't accept their input.
Why now is the right time to start your own business
Now is the right time to start your own business. Businesses need you and your expertise now more than ever.
Values
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Living your values is the hardest and easiest path
You can't decide how other people live, but you can be true to yourself. Bonus: You'll sleep better.
How to learn from your mistakes
Everyone makes mistakes, especially when they’re doing something worthwhile. It’s what you do next that counts. Here's how to learn from your mistakes.
Work
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What you need to do to make brilliant work
If you suck at something you care about, you're already on the way
Work
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You've made more progress than you realise
If you're a frustrated high-achiever, you might not appreciate your achievements. This is your reminder.
The risks of self-employment: the good, the bad, and the ugly
Learn the promises and risks of self employment, so you can design a business and lifestyle to support your goals.
What to do before you quit your job to start a business
Before you quit your job you should know your reasons, know your numbers, and keep your connections.
Work
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3 good reasons to go consulting
People are leaving traditional employment in droves. Here's three reasons to go consulting - and how you can get it right.
Change
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The joy of instability
There’s no answer. No done. No end of the road where everything falls into place. Why would you want that? To sit still, and change nothing until you die?
From here to there and back again
An unvarnished high-level explanation of my career as prompted by curious conference-goers this week
Strategy
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Take big bets on a vague long game
Life's not chess. Do risky stuff with lots of potential if you want a more interesting life.
Identity
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Don't stumble over something behind you
Turns out, the biggest thing holding you back is you, and your shit. DAMN IT.
Society
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Gaslighting at work
If your boss is questioning your wellbeing, maybe they're a reality-denying asshole with a gaslighting problem?
How to craft your value proposition
When you have a clear value proposition you show up with confidence and intention. You attract better clients, do better work, and achieve better results.
Grief, family and temporary communities
Do we all need our own Fight Club, to navigate the insanity of life, death and dysfunction?
Work
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Why I'll never have a job again
Don't be fooled into thinking your job is secure: the risk is just hiding.
Work
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10 questions to boost your professional credibility
Bad questions make you look stupid. Good questions make you look smart. Killer questions make you look strategic.
Saving time
This week's Friday Flurry goes deep on Jenny Odell's new book, and gets a bit meta. What is time, what is it for, and how healthy is your relationship with it? Is that your fault? (Spoiler: no.)
Remember who it's all for
If you waste your effort appealing to the wrong people, you won't connect with the people who matter most.
Work
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You aren't uniquely shameful, problematic, or lazy.
If you're guilty about how you're spending your time, or worried you might be a terrible person deep down... don't panic.
Society
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Why women are so bloody exhausted right now
Men - read this to find out why the vaccuum cleaner is always out.
Change
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It's never too late to start something new
If you're telling yourself you've left it too late, or you're risking too much to start again, you should stop that immediately.
Change
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Share your work in progress
Reasons to share your works in progress, especially when you're not very good yet.
Change
·
Reasons, seasons and changing jobs
You don't have to stick with your job, or even your career. If you're looking for a permission slip, here it is.
Work
·
People are opting out of corporate bullshit
Companies are scrambling look like good employers, but ruining it by keeping people trapped in boring meetings and trying to force them back into the office. Here's why they're losing the game.
Identity
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Pick your path: stress, guilt, fear
Help for three of your most pressing problems: managing stress, banishing guilt and overcoming fear. Enjoy.
Work
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How to shape a fulfilling career
If you crave meaningful work, it might not happen by accident. Here's how to shape a fulfilling career, by asking 5 questions.
Identity
·
Happy people don't judge you
People who are healthy, happy and satisfied don't waste their energy worrying what others are doing. Happy people don't judge you.
8 critical self-employment skills
Not everyone is cut out for self-employment. Here are 8 of the most important self employment skills you need to master for success.
Identity
·
7 ways to feel better about your job
If you're struggling to feel good about your job, don't quit just yet. Try these 7 ways to feel better about your job.
AI
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How to stop AI from stealing your job
ChatGPT is the latest AI tool to break the internet. Learn how to beat AI and stop it stealing your job by asking better questions.
Work
·
5 career mistakes everyone (from junior to executive) should avoid
Avoid these five career mistakes for a more fulfilling and meaningful career.
Work towards the grain
When you work towards the grain, you generate incredible results and find endless reserves of energy and creativity. When you work against it, you suffer in silence.
Strategy
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Don't be afraid to narrow down
The planning paradox - the more specific you are, the more your opportunities expand.
Identity
·
Setting boundaries around bullsh*t
Take a personal inventory of where you're spending your time, to eliminate the things that threaten your personal or professional peace.
Change
·
Time to change: 4 signs that you need to take action
There are 4 key signs that it's time to change. Check them out.
Change
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There is always a market for uncertainty
Advice for employees, consultants, leaders and politicians
Videos
7 steps to focus your time and energy - free resource
A handy 7-step system to beat overwhelm - and a workbook to support your process!
We F*@KIN Love Startups with Troy Hammond
Business, bourbon and burnouts
SKY TV Interview: Post pandemic leadership skills
Alicia McKay appears on Sky News to discuss flexibility and leadership skills post-COVID.
The AM show interview: Missing leadership skills
The AM Show with Duncan Garner
Podcasts
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What's On Your Mind?
Catch up on episodes of What's On Your Mind? with Alicia McKay and Digby Scott
Unleash the strategist within webinar
In this webinar, Alicia talks about how to bring strategic skills to your life and work.
Play the long game webinar
In this webinar, Alicia shares skills for playing a longer game
Videos
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Auckland District Health Board, Online, September 2020
Alicia McKay spoke to the ADHB change manager community of practice online - watch a video excerpt inside!
Webinars
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Building buy in webinar
In this webinar, Alicia talks about how to build buy in for new initiatives
Online keynote: preparing for change
Excerpt from ADHB online keynote about thriving in change
Less content, more connection webinar
In this lockdown webinar, Alicia talks about how to build strong connections remotely
Meetings that matter webinar
In this webinar, Alicia talks about how to lead strategic conversations that drive change.
Your new normal webinar
In this webinar, Alicia shares skills for playing a longer game
Webinars
·
Dialling into opportunity webinar
In this webinar, Alicia talks about how to accelerate progress in uncertainty
Engaging for change webinar
In this webinar, Alicia talks about how to engage people in change.
Resources
7 steps to focus your time and energy - free resource
A handy 7-step system to beat overwhelm - and a workbook to support your process!
Play the long game resource pack
Download your guide to playing a longer game
Podcasts
·
What's On Your Mind?
Catch up on episodes of What's On Your Mind? with Alicia McKay and Digby Scott
Unleash the strategist within webinar
In this webinar, Alicia talks about how to bring strategic skills to your life and work.
Play the long game webinar
In this webinar, Alicia shares skills for playing a longer game
Get Your Shit Together: A value-packed workbook for frustrated high achievers
22 pages of tools, templates and insights to help you get back on track.
Webinars
·
Building buy in webinar
In this webinar, Alicia talks about how to build buy in for new initiatives
Online keynote: preparing for change
Excerpt from ADHB online keynote about thriving in change
Less content, more connection webinar
In this lockdown webinar, Alicia talks about how to build strong connections remotely
Meetings that matter webinar
In this webinar, Alicia talks about how to lead strategic conversations that drive change.
Your new normal webinar
In this webinar, Alicia shares skills for playing a longer game
Webinars
·
Dialling into opportunity webinar
In this webinar, Alicia talks about how to accelerate progress in uncertainty
Engaging for change webinar
In this webinar, Alicia talks about how to engage people in change.